Trying to reach out to people is very difficult anymore. Being naturally very introverted has always made this more difficult and delicate, and has always made me latch on to the people that I can actually stand to be around for some time. But something I’ve realized from all the relationships I’ve had is that it always seems to be a bit one-sided: I’m always the one that has to take the initiative with everything, despite being labeled as the antisocial one of any sort of circle. I’m the girl who always has to call her boyfriend to see what he’s doing, who is inevitably busy with things like Call of Duty. I don’t understand this because it makes me think that I have incredibly high expectations that are impossible to be met or maybe there is actually something very wrong with me. Then, I think to myself: Is having someone call you and see how you are, like once a week, asking for too much? Is hanging out every other week or so too much to handle for a friendship? Or is it just that we’re all twenty-somethings and we’re too busy with our own microcosms and figuring our lives out that we forget each other? Or maybe it’s just that I’m such a depressingly dull person to be around with, that people rather just read what I write because that’s the only thing about me that is at least somewhat redeeming?

I ask myself: We’re both doing nothing, so why don’t we do nothing together?